I don't necessarily agree 100% with the opinions expressed in all those quotes but i think that, like a good joke, they contain at least an element of truth.

On my quotation page:

”[]…a pretty gift for quotation [] is a serviceable substitute for wit.” -- W. Somerset Maugham

Could be my motto:
"When two paths open up before you, always choose the hardest one." -- Norbou in the movie Himalaya

"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Use it up, wear it out, make it do, or do without." -- Amish proverb

"I have no need of hope in order to undertake, nor of success in order to persevere." -- William of Orange

"Live for the moment, look at the moon, the cherry-blossom and maple leaves, love wine, women, and poetry, encounter with humor the poverty that stares you in the face and don't be discouraged by it, let yourself be carried along on the river of life like a calabash that drifts downstream, that is what 'ukio' means." -- Asai Ryoi

"Engineering is easy - it's the people problems that are hard." -- Temple Grandin

"Rules are useful guidelines for stupid people who cannot make up their own minds." -- Gregory House, MD

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -- Dr. Seuss

On knowledge and learning:

”Never memorize something that you can look up.” -- Albert Einstein

"For men of true learning and almost universal knowledge, always pity the ignorance of others; but fellows who excel in some little, low, contemptible art, are always certain to despise those who are unacquainted with that art." -- Henry Fielding

”Study the Ways of all professions.” -- Miyamoto Musashi

"To have another language is to possess a second soul." -- Charlemagne

"Those who know nothing of foreign languages know nothing of their own." --Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be yet wiser; teach a just man, and he will increase in learning." -- Proverbs 9:9

”Overemphasis of the competitive system and premature specialization on the ground of immediate usefulness kill the spirit on which all cultural life depends, specialized knowledge included.” -- Albert Einstein

”...He [a student] must acquire a vivid sense of the beautiful and of the morally good. Otherwise he - with his specialized knowledge - more closely resembles a well-trained dog than a harmoniously developed person.” -- Albert Einstein

"Now people are driven to develop specific skills to make money. There’s a wisdom deficit in our world." -- James Martin

"Independence of mind, enthusiasm, dedication to the field, and willingness to challenge and question and to explore new direction. There are plenty of people like that, but schools tend to discourage those characteristics." -- Noam Chomsky (when asked about qualities to look for in a student)

"Real knowledge is to know the extent of one's ignorance." -- Confucius

"'Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad." -- Brian O'Driscoll

On reading:

"Who reads, lives twice."-- Umberto Eco

"Tell me what books you have at home and I will tell you who you are." -- Karol Irzykowski

"Reading after a certain age diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits."-- Albert Einstein

On creativity and imagination:

”It is in the compelling zest of high adventure and of victory, and in creative action, that man finds his supreme joys.” -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

”If you want to build a ship, don't drum up the men to gather wood, divide the work and give orders. Instead, teach them to yearn for the vast and endless sea. ” -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

”A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral. ” -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

”If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put foundations under them.” – Henry David Thoreau

”La perfection est atteinte non quand il ne reste rien à ajouter, mais quand il ne reste rien à enlever. (You know you've achieved perfection in design, not when you have nothing more to add, but when you have nothing more to take away.) ” -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"Make things as simple as possible, but not simpler." -- Albert Einstein

"The ideal of beauty is simplicity and tranquility." -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"Less is more." -- Ludwig Mies van der Rohe

”David was already in the stone. I just took away what wasn't David. ” -- Michelangelo

”Uncommon men require no common trust; give him but the scope and he will set the bounds.” -- Friedrich von Schiller

"The best way to predict the future is to invent it." -- Alan Kay

On debt:

Think what you do when you run in debt; you give to another power over your liberty. — Benjamin Franklin

Rather go to bed supperless than rise in debt. — Benjamin Franklin

On television:

"...kind of monster, a way for people to waste a lot of their lives." -- Philo Fornsworth, inventor of TV

On American football:

"Football combines the two worst things about America: it is violence punctuated by committee meetings." -- George Will

On travel:

”The World is a book, and those who do not travel read only a page.” -- Saint Augustine (354-430)

"He who travels much comes to know more than he who lives long." -- attributed to Sheikh Abu Abdallah Mohammed bin Ibrahim al-Lawati (Ibn Battuta)

”He who would travel happily must travel light.” -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

”Travel is the best antidote to prejudice, bigotry, and ignorance.” -- Mark Twain

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." -- Mark Twain

”Traveling is a way to reverse time, to a small extent, and make a day last a year - or at least forty-five hours - and traveling is an easy way of surrounding ourselves, as in childhood, with what we cannot understand.” -- Pico Iyer

”If I were a medical man, I should prescribe a holiday to any patient who considers his work important.” -- Bertrand Russell

"One's destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things." -- Henry Miller

On money and status:

”Money only appeals to selfishness and irresistibly invites abuse. Can anyone imagine Moses, Jesus, or Gandhi armed with the money-bags of Carnegie?” -- Albert Einstein

”It is preoccupation with possessions, more than anything else, that prevents men from living freely and nobly.” -- Bertrand Russell

”Almost all of the finer things in life are free or nearly free. You don’t have to pay for the sky at night or snow in the morning or a kiss on the nose when you’re sick. Forgetting that may put you at the mercy of those who seek to profit by convincing you to want whatever it is they have to sell.” -- Marilyn vos Savant

"You can sleep in only one bed at a time." -- Jack London

"I wish that man would no longer be ruled by greed, but just enjoy the simple things of life - most of which are free." -- Josephine Wall

”The ideals which have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been Kindness, Beauty, and Truth. The trite subjects of human efforts, possessions, outward success, luxury have always seemed to me contemptible.” -- Albert Einstein

“To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness.” -- Bertrand Russell

“I know a planet where there is a certain red-faced gentleman. He has never smelled a flower. He has never looked at a star. He has never loved any one. He has never done anything in his life but add up figures. And all day he says over and over, just like you: ‘I am busy with matters of consequence!’ And that makes him swell up with pride. But he is not a man, he is a mushroom! ” -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery (The Little Prince)

”If you you are going to let the fear of poverty govern your life...your reward will be that you will eat, but you will not live.” -- George Bernard Shaw

"The insanity of consumption bothers me. Talk about the opiate of the masses. It ain't religion anymore. It's stuff." -- Emma Thompson

"God shows his contempt for wealth by the kind of person he selects to receive it." -- Austin O'Malley

"A lot of apathetic people are as happy as pigs, watching reality TV shows and getting drunk on a Friday night." -- James Martin

"A little integrity is better than any career." -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Remember this: Even if you win the rat race, you're still a rat." -- The Rev. William Sloane Coffin

"Unless you choose to do great things with it, it makes no difference how much you are rewarded, or how much power you have." -- Oprah Winfrey

"Nothing on this planet is permanent, and this is why I believe there can be no such thing as possession." -- Sebastien Foucan

On business:

"Sell a man a fish, he eats for a day, teach a man how to fish, you ruin a wonderful business opportunity" -- Karl Marx

On political leaders:

”Our great democracies still tend to think that a stupid man is more likely to be honest than a clever man.” -- Bertrand Russell

”The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people are so full of doubts.” -- Bertrand Russell

”Political leaders or governments owe their position partly to force and partly to popular election. They cannot be regarded as representative of best elements, morally or intellectually, in their respective nations.” -- Albert Einstein

"The ordinary American voter does not object to mediocrity. He likes his candidate to be sensible, vigorous, and, above all, what he calls 'magnetic,' and does not value, because he sees no need for, originality or profundity, a fine culture or a wide knowledge." -- James Bryce

"Anyone willing to do what is required to become president of the United States is thereby barred from taking that office. I’m only half joking" -- Alan Greenspan

”The other thing that gives a scientific man the creeps in the world today are the methods of choosing leaders - in every nation. Today, for example, in the United States, the two political parties have decided to employ public relations men, that is, advertising men, who are trained in the necessary methods of telling the truth or lying in order to develop a product. ” -- Richard Philips Feynman

"The elections are run by the same guys who sell toothpaste. They show you an image of a sports hero, or a sexy model, or a car going up a sheer cliff or something, which has nothing to do with the commodity, but it's intended to delude you into picking this one rather than another one." -- Noam Chomsky

”Politics and the fate of mankind are shaped by men without ideals and without greatness. Men who have greatness within them don't go in for politics.” -- Albert Camus

”Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.” -- Abraham Lincoln

On patriotism:

"...internationalism is the the highest form of patriotism." --Christopher Hitchens

"I feel at home in the entire world, wherever there are clouds and birds and human tears." --Rosa Luxemburg

"Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons." --Bertrand Russell

"Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel." -- Samuel Johnson

"Each nation feels superior to other nations. That breeds patriotism - and wars." --Dale Carnegie

"Since humans are by nature tribal, the overall goal is to expand the concept of the tribe to include ALL members of the species, in a global free society." -- Michael Shermer

"There are no countries - only rivers and mountains and houses and people." -- David Niven in Escape to Athena

On independent thought:

"Great spirits have always encountered violent oppostion from mediocre minds." -- Albert Einstein

”Few people are capable of expressing with equanimity opinions that differ from the prejudices of their social environment. Most people are even incapable of forming such opinions.” -- Albert Einstein

”I think we ought always to entertain our opinions with some measure of doubt. I shouldn’t wish people dogmatically to believe any philosophy, even mine.” -- Bertrand Russell

”I would never die for my beliefs because I might be wrong.” -- Bertrand Russell

"Doubt everything. Find your own light" -- Buddha

"Be critical of everything, especially things you agree with." -- Peter Winn

"Believe nothing, no matter where you read it or who has said it, not even if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense." – Buddha

”Many people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do.” -- Bertrand Russell

”Men fear thought as they fear nothing else on earth -- more than ruin -- more even than death.... Thought is subversive and revolutionary, destructive and terrible, thought is merciless to privilege, established institutions, and comfortable habit. Thought looks into the pit of hell and is not afraid. Thought is great and swift and free, the light of the world, and the chief glory of man.” -- Bertrand Russell

”In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep.”-- Albert Einstein

"Don't pay attention to "authorities," think for yourself." -- Richard Philips Feynman

"Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth." -- Albert Einstein

”Without the creative personalities able to think independently, the upward development of society is unthinkable as the development of the individual personality without the nourishing soil of the community.”-- Albert Einstein

”Nothing in the world makes people so afraid as the influence of independent minded people.” -- Albert Einstein

On freedom:

"None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

"Why do you weep?" inquired the young siskin of the old, "You're more comfortable in this cage than out in the cold." "You were born caged," said the elder, "this was your morrow; "I was free, now I'm caged—hence the cause of my sorrow." -- Ignacy Krasicki, Birds in a Cage

"Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety. " -- Benjamin Franklin

On morality and religion:

”Do not to others as you would not have them do to you.” -- Confucius

”Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” -- Jesus of Nazareth

"Consider others as yourself." -- Buddha (Dhammapada)

”Give to every other human being every right that you claim for yourself.” -- Robert Ingersoll

”When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad, and that is my religion.” -- Abraham Lincoln

”My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.” -- Albert Einstein

”I am convinced that a vivid consciousness of the primary importance of moral principles for the betterment and ennoblement of life does not need the idea of law-giver, especially a law-giver who works on the basis of reward and punishment.” -- Albert Einstein

"I think it's a problem that people are considered immoral if they're not religious. That's just not true.... If you do something for a religious reason, you do it because you'll be rewarded in an afterlife or in this world. That's not quite as good as something you do for purely generous reasons." -- Lisa Randall

"Even without a religion, we can become a good human being." -- HH the Dalai Lama

"Igore all organized faiths and keep to the road of higher consciousness." -- HH the Dalai Lame as quoted by Deepak Chopra

“The teaching of Christ, as it appears in the Gospels, has had extraordinarily little to do with the ethics of the Christians.” -- Bertrand Russell

"I like your Jesus, but not your Christians...your Christians are so unlike your Jesus." -- Mahatma Gandhi

"If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be - a Christian." -- Mark Twain

"I am a Jew, but I am enthralled by the luminous figure of the Nazarene." -- Albert Einstein

"In religion and politics people's beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination, from authorities who have not themselves examined the questions at issue but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing." -- Mark Twain

"I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkey's." -- Mark Twain

"The so-called Christian nations are the most enlightened and progressive...but in spite of their religion, not because of it. The Church has opposed every innovation and discovery from the day of Galileo down to our own time, when the use of anesthetic in childbirth was regarded as a sin because it avoided the biblical curse pronounced against Eve. And every step in astronomy and geology ever taken has been opposed by bigotry and superstition." -- Mark Twain

"The Bible (is) a collection of honorable, but still primitive legends which are nevertheless pretty childish. No interpretation no matter how subtle can (for me) change this." -- Albert Einstein

"For me the Jewish religion like all others is an incarnation of the most childish superstitions. And the Jewish people...have no diffrent quality for me than all other people...although they are protected from the worst cancers by the lack of power. Otherwise, I cannot see anything 'chosen' about them." -- Albert Einstein

"If we are honest—and as scientists honesty is our precise duty—we cannot help but admit that any religion is a pack of false statements, deprived of any real foundation. The very idea of God is a product of human imagination.... I do not recognize any religious myth, at least because they contradict one another" -- Paul Dirac

"I regard the brain as a computer which will stop working when its components fail. There is no heaven or afterlife for broken down computers; that is a fairy story for people afraid of the dark." -- Stephen Hawking

"If you keep your eyes so fixed on heaven that you never look at the earth, you will stumble into hell." -- Austin O'Malley

On crime:

"I know that philosophically a murderer is not responsible for his crime, but I prefer not to take tea with him." -- Albert Einstein

"The law tends to assume that criminal behavior is a matter of free will. I wonder if this is entirely true." -- Bernard Gesch

"Father forgive them for they know not what they are doing." -- Jesus of Nazareth

On war and peace:

“All who draw the sword will die by the sword.” – Jesus of Nazareth

“War is not an adventure. It is a disease. It is like typhus.“ -- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

"An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind." -- Mahatma Gandhi

”Anybody who really wants to abolish war must resolutely declare himself in favor of his own country’s resigning a portion of sovereignty in place of international institutions.” -- Albert Einstein

"I look upon myself as a man. Nationalism is an infantile disease, the measles of mankind." -- Albert Einstein when asked if he was a German or a Jew

"If mothers ruled the world, there would be no goddamned wars in the first place." -- Sally Field

"The real war is not between the West and the East. The real war is between intelligent and stupid people."-- Marjane Satrapi


”...Intelligence and character of the masses are incomparably lower than the intelligence and character of the few who produce something valuable for the community.” -- Albert Einstein

”Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. ” -- Margaret Mead

”The person who is truly effective has the humility and reverence to recognize his own perceptual limitations and to appreciate the rich available through interactions with the hearts and minds of other human beings. ” -- Stephen R. Covey

”The majority of the stupid is invincible and guaranteed for all time. The terror of their tyranny, however, is alleviated by their lack of consistency.” -- Albert Einstein

”Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

”A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.” -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

”If there were in the world today any large number of people who desired their own happiness more than they desired the unhappiness of others, we would have paradise in a few years.” -- Bertrand Russell

“If we examine the various ideologies that tend to divide the humanity, such as racism, extreme nationalism and the Marxist class struggle, one of the key factors of their origin is the tendency to perceive things as inherently divided and disconnected.” -- David Bohm as quoted by HH the Dalai Lama

”All that is necessary for the evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.” – Edmund Burke

“He who passively accepts evil is as much involved as he who helps perpetrate it.” -- Martin Luther King Jr.

”Only a life lived for the others is a life worthwhile.” -- Albert Einstein

"The great man shows his greatness by the way he treats the little man." -- Anonymous

”You cannot hope to build a better world without improving the individuals. To that end, each of us must work for our own improvement and, at the same time, share a general responsibility for all humanity, our particular duty being to aid those to whom we think we can be most useful.”-- Marie Curie

"Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed." -- Booker T. Washington

”The earth does not belong to human beings; human beings belong to the earth.” -- Chief Seattle

"In our every delibertion, we must consider the impact of our decisions on the next seven generation." -- from the Great Law Of The Iroquois Confederacy

”Clever talk and domineering manner have little to with being a Man at His Best.” -- Confucius

"You should live each day as if it was the first day of your life and the last day of your life." -- some preacher

For fun:

“The glass is always half-empty. And it’s cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth.” -- Jeanine Garofalo

“If you keep spoon-feeding people shit they’ll ask for more.” -- Jeanine Garofalo